We Are Blending

Do you ever just have a whim, a flight of fancy, to pick up and go to the dollar movies?  I discovered recently that our "dollar" movies are actually $1.95, but that's besides the point.  Dollar movies just sounds better.

So Jake, Steph, Matt, and I are finishing up dinner and talking about doing something fun.  Although there is school tomorrow, both kids were ready for it and the movie in question, Zombieland, had a 7:40 showing.  We'd all be in bed in plenty of time to get enough sleep for tomorrow.

Zombieland, how can I describe it?  If this doesn't become a cult classic, I don't know movies.  And I know a little about movies.  Love them.  Can't get enough of them.  Jake isn't much of a movie lover, so if he's into a flick I'm gonna be sure to at least give it a try.

We wore our sweats and got in just after the movie started.  One of the main themes of the movie is where the lead protagonist (played by a very fit Woody Harrelson), "Tallahassee," craves an honest to goodness Twinkie.  It symbolizes a happier, simpler time in his life and aside from whacking Zombies, nothing gives him more pleasure.

After the movie, we all decided to go on a quest to get Twinkies for ourselves.  Being more of a food purist, I hadn't bitten into a Twinkie for over a decade.  At least.  Apparently they're high dollar items now and too good for our local convenience stores.  Finally, after Jake braved over 5 locations on the way home, we stopped at a full grocery store and there they were, located next to the DingDongs and HoHos.  Something's very wrong with the Hostess Corporation's snack naming division.  I'm just going to leave it at that.

The kids were so overjoyed to dork out by going on our Twinkie quest and to finally bite into that spongy, sweet, creamy chemical, er, goodness.  After a couple of bites I put mine aside.  It really doesn't bear much relationship at all to food, does it?

Now the kids are joking about having those same remaining Twinkies in the box for when they're in college and need a snack. They'll keep.

Meanwhile, we had a delightful, memorable evening all on impulse and silliness.  I love that.  Zombieland Rule #32: Enjoy the Little Things.

Tonight I want to tell you something amazing.  Jake and I got engaged!!  For those of you who know me and Jake, you know that this really isn't his name.  But Jake is such a good name to describe him that I'm sure you'll forgive me.  It's manly, hot, and let's face it, Jake is a pretty fun and interesting character in the Eclipse series!

It was so natural.  We were talking and he simply asked me to be his wife.  For one stunning moment I couldn't answer.  Jake started to tell me I didn't have to answer him right away, when I just pressed my finger to his lips so that I could finally say "Yes!"

This picture was taken at the jewelry store where we found my ring.  He got down on one knee and proposed all over again. It is truly the most exquisite ring and I couldn't feel more lucky.

But there's so much more to tell, Dear Reader.  There's a wedding to plan, and there are two households to combine.  Jake needs to meet my Mom and extended family.  I need to meet his extended family.  Dogs must be trained, kids must be cared for sensitively, and I can't stop working out every day just because there's more to do in a day than there used to be. And most challenging of all:  I gave up coffee the day after Thanksgiving. Caffeine had been the love of my life before Jake.

So for tonight, I wish you pleasant dreams, wishes that come true, and a steaming cup of caffeinated goodness in the morning.  Tea lattes, anyone?

Am pretty recovered from yesterday's irritation with Hobbes. Somehow he gathered that he was not my favorite dog just then and he stayed byy side being sweet and looking at me with his secret weapon: those melty, tawny brown eyes. *sigh* Jake wants to take him to special training classes, which might help.
Plus everyhing's just so much better this morning. Swine flu came back for round two, but I seem to be beating it down faster. I even feel like baking bisquits after having tea. Not much productive happens until after caffeine has been prepared and drank.
Jake and I also went driving for Christmas light displays in people's yards last night. My favorite!!!! More on that soon. Meanwhile, I hope your day is "merry and bright." Today feels better than I've felt all November.

Is it ever wrong to be completely irritated with a dog?  When it's your boyfriend's dog?  And you're trying to make everything work, but tired of the added excitement the dog inevitably brings?

If so, then you'll understand my angst.  Hobbes, the hound mix who wasn't facing the camera for this pic, is, well . . . dull.  That's putting it nicely.  Jake says the Vet himself said that Hobbes "would never win any spelling bees."  I think that about covers it.

At first, it just seemed like good natured kidding.  After several weeks of observation, however, I've concluded that everyone's right and that Hobbes is, in fact, irretrievably stupid.  And friendly to "his" people and dogs.  Everyone else is a deathly threat, including our friends at the door . . .  As I said, he's not very bright.

And add to all this charm the fact that he steals food like no other creature I know, except for my ex, Justin, but at least Justin is a lot cleaner and invited into the kitchen.  Hobbes was never invited to graze off the kitchen counter when my back is turned.

The thing that gets me about him is the fact that no matter what he does and how he's disciplined, he gets that same sweet, stupid look on his face and seems to have no idea of what's going on.  Stupid.  And it's hard to stay mad at that, but it sure is irritating!!!

So I finally said something about it more directly today so that we can figure some sane way out of this situation.  Hobbes is indeed dumb (though charming at times).  It would be dumber to stay silent on the subject.

Gahhhh!!! I'm just coming up out of a terrible, achy, sore-throated session with a virus, complete with chills and feeling like I may never have the energy to smile or open my eyes again.

Just after highly productive work/cleaning/cooking sessions on Monday, this terrible virus attacked, like that vampire actor on Halloween, and sucked the energy and color right out of me for a good 36 hours. Now I'm pale, but at least dressed and out of bed. (reaches for tea)

Jake was there. He took care of me (and the kids when they needed someone) while I drank lots of Emergen-C, hot tea, and dozed off to favorite movies. If there had been any doubt left about what kind of person he is, this evaporated. He was patient, knew when to leave me alone and when to offer help. Since I'm usually the person taking care of others, it was strangely nice.

He's a keeper.

Halloween night I popped a vampire on the jaw because he wouldn't stop touching me. It was surprising, really. It seems as though that particular fight or flight impulse is still in order.

Jake (my bf), and a few friends of ours went to Netherworld, one of the top haunted houses in the nation, on Halloween night. It was my first night with grown ups doing fun things on Halloween in about 20 years because Justin (my ex) drove to the house to be with the kids, hand out candy, and keep the terriers from dying of a heart attack.

Darcy, the older terrier, threatens a coronary every Halloween. You'd think its doomsday every time the doorbell rings (which is almost non-stop) and costumed kids show up. His eyes bug out and he shakes. I'm not much better after the basement flash flooded a couple of years on Halloween night, but I digress. Apparently this year it went better. The puppy (Pico) barked and ran to the door and Darcy took the night off from his responsibilities as intrepid, vicious guard dog.

Meanwhile, Jake, Jason, Angie, Cynthia, and I had a marvelous time waiting in the cold rain at Netherworld. We actually did! We were all worrried about Cynthia popping an actor, because of her finely honed skills as a rugby player, but I surprised everyone, including the genuinely scary vampire by popping him with a well placed jab along his jaw when he ignored my warning to "stop touching me." Kapow!!
I controlled the punch, but gave him enough to get his caped arse away from me. I guess I forgot to mention that I used to have a black belt in TaeKwonDo. :p

And while on the subject of arses, I never swore this would be a family blog, but a blog about family, which is very different! The whole question about doing this while remaining sane is central to this whole foray into the unknown.


Most of us celebrated Halloween a new way that night. Don got to intimidate slouchy, uncostumed, older kids who normally attempt breaking and entering in their glee for free candy. Jake and I got to have a real night out with friends having fun. The kids pretty much did their usual thing as if I'd been there instead without having to leave their friends in order to go their Dad's place. It was good.

So I guess that when it came to the parking lot vampire at Netherworld, I chose to fight. Flight was my choice this year when it came to Halloween at the house. Sometimes fighting for what you want is the best thing in the world, even when so much is new and undefined. I'm fighting for sanity. Every day. It's not easy bringing up teenagers, working a commission job, staying in shape, and keeping the house together every day. Many days I feel ineffectual. But I chose to fight.

It's raining outside and I'm sitting here at my desk, coffee nearby, wondering how to describe what it is that I'm doing with this project.

My ex-husband is out of the house running errands in preparation for our dinner tonight. At dinner there will be me, my ex-husband (who sleeps upstairs when he visits), two of our three kids (one is serving in the Navy in Guam just recently), my boyfriend, and a long time friend of my daughter's who will be spending the night.

Does anything here look strange? I can tell you that it feels strange, but it also works very well and feels right. Well, most of the time it does. There's always going to be a sense of unreality and discomfort, I suppose, but it's so much better for all of us than the Jerry Springer show styled alternatives. It's not perfect and there are a lot of questions to be answered as we go along, but so far so good.

Three years ago I got divorced while going back to college to earn a second degree so that I could be more marketable professionally. Communcations, my major, is a lifelong passion for me, so getting a degree in it was fascinating, even though the experience of going back to college full time as a single Mom of three is another story for another time. Boy is it ever!

The question is: How does this work, blending the lives of me and my (serious) boyfriend, three kids, and their Dad? And let's not forget all of our common friends and extended family, because since we tend to celebrate all the major holidays and birthdays together, this means that all of us are going to be going out or cooking together.

And while I'm on the subject, cooking is another grand passion of mine. I believe that well prepared food in a pleasant environment has the power to bring people together. This is one of the ingredients that's being blended into this mix.

So I'm going to share about what it's like to bring together a new kind of family, new kinds of partnerships, with a little cooking thrown in, because I can't restrain myself. Besides, maybe in the cooking and the posting and the pictures, you'll be drawn into our little blended family project, if only a little.

Meanwhile, I wish you every happiness and thank you for stopping by my desk. The cappucino there is steamy and waiting to be sipped. Care for a cup?